Sweet Tomorrows
by Debbie Macomber
Sweet Tomorrows might have been tailor-made exclusively for me to dislike it. In a way, I marvel at Debbie Macomber’s talent, as she was able to weave in every element that would rub me the wrong way. There are two romances in this book, the fifth and final installment in the Rose Harbor Inn series. One features a war veteran who has put his own feelings ahead of the woman he claims to love more than life itself. He abruptly left her to return to the Middle East, believing that if he stayed in Cedar Cove with his sweetheart, he would not deserve her. He never asked her how she felt, if she believed him to be a coward or irresponsible, and he never gave her any explanation as to his departure. He merely took off and expected her to wait, not even knowing if he were alive or dead. He didn't even care that she was a war widow who had gone through the exact same situation with her husband years earlier. To me, this is not a man to wait for. To me, this is a very selfish man who doesn't deserve to be in a relationship at all, regardless of how many missions he has completed.
The second romance features one of Debbie Macomber’s stock dynamics: a rude and gruff man paired with a very friendly and giving woman. Of course, the man has deep-seeded troubles; the reader is supposed to not only understand but excuse his rotten behavior. We are supposed to hope that his problems get solved by this sweet heroine, but what does he have to offer in return? In real life, such a woman would sacrifice and deplete herself until the day she died trying – and failing – to bring him out of his shell and mend his wounds. However, in Sweet Tomorrows, we are supposed to believe that this pair is meant to be together and just needs to overcome a couple of obstacles. . .such as severe anxiety and mental problems. The troubled gentleman literally has panic attacks when he has to deal with other people, and he uses his love interest as a crutch, often physically grasping hold of her while he shakes and tries to breathe. He uses manipulative language to keep her hooked into his drama, saying he needs her and can’t function without her. She feels important because he can trust her and show his vulnerable underbelly, but that is not what is happening. He is testing her to see if she will put up with this type of unacceptable behavior, and if she does, he will continue to do it for the rest of their lives.
It is damaging to make single, lonely women (the main demographic of romance novels) think that these types of men are the ones to pursue and settle for. If you disagree with my diatribe, I would recommend intense therapy followed by Mandy Hale’s The Single Woman.
The second romance features one of Debbie Macomber’s stock dynamics: a rude and gruff man paired with a very friendly and giving woman. Of course, the man has deep-seeded troubles; the reader is supposed to not only understand but excuse his rotten behavior. We are supposed to hope that his problems get solved by this sweet heroine, but what does he have to offer in return? In real life, such a woman would sacrifice and deplete herself until the day she died trying – and failing – to bring him out of his shell and mend his wounds. However, in Sweet Tomorrows, we are supposed to believe that this pair is meant to be together and just needs to overcome a couple of obstacles. . .such as severe anxiety and mental problems. The troubled gentleman literally has panic attacks when he has to deal with other people, and he uses his love interest as a crutch, often physically grasping hold of her while he shakes and tries to breathe. He uses manipulative language to keep her hooked into his drama, saying he needs her and can’t function without her. She feels important because he can trust her and show his vulnerable underbelly, but that is not what is happening. He is testing her to see if she will put up with this type of unacceptable behavior, and if she does, he will continue to do it for the rest of their lives.
It is damaging to make single, lonely women (the main demographic of romance novels) think that these types of men are the ones to pursue and settle for. If you disagree with my diatribe, I would recommend intense therapy followed by Mandy Hale’s The Single Woman.